Category Archives: Life

Cosmic

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I hurried in to Wal*Mart to pick up a prescription. I don’t usually use their pharmacy because that store is always so busy. You can’t just drop by and pick it up. Anyway, at first glance I wasn’t sure exactly where the starting point for the pharmacy pick-up might have been. I was behind some lady under a sign that said “consulting”. As I noticed that, I scooched over a bit and was sort of in the correct position to be next. Not that it mattered, I was the only other person there.  Until this – young woman – pulled up, in exactly the right spot.  The cashier looked up and asked if he could help. In a tone that said he really didn’t want to, but whatever.  She saw me, but proceeded to the counter. Nice, right? So I’m sitting there stewing, giving her the very slight benefit of the doubt.  Then she places her additional purchases on the counter… with her coupons!  Seriously, you are going to do that in this line?

But there is a problem. The coupon(s) aren’t scanning correctly. Bam, the register is locked up. So we (by this time there are more people in line behind me) wait while the cashier goes to find someone to call for a CSM.

OK, now this is where I start to like the cashier!  While he’s waiting for CSM to come, he jumps on another register and asks if he can help me. As I’m approaching, she gets a panicky look and sounds out “Can you call the CSM again?  I’ve got a doctors appointment in five minutes!”

As the cashier is helping me with my thirty second purchase, I begin to smile a little. As I walk out, get in my car and drive away, I’m thinking that she may be there awhile, waiting on that CSM. Ain’t karma a bitch?

On the Wind

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Many years ago, I was going through the pain of a breakup. I was at my girlfriends parent’s place on Long Island. They had easy access to the beach, although it was the wrong time of year for dipping in the salt water. I knew we were over, and I wish I hadn’t come.

I slipped away from the group, to sit and think with the sand as a cushion and the ocean wind on my face. As I sat, I began to realize something. The knots in my stomach, the tightness in my chest, the misery that was our relationship seemed to be fading. Fading, like a sandcastle before the wind. Blowing away, loosening its hold. If one had eyes of the soul, perhaps I would appear like the aurora borealis, the solar wind blowing above the night sky, leaving tendrils for all to see.

Eventually, they came looking for me. I knew then that the elevation of spirit I had experienced was only temporary, like ionized nitrogen atoms losing an electron. Passing as it was, it was one of the most welcome feelings I’ve ever had.

Years later, on the other side of our grand, expansive country I had an opportunity to go fishing on the ocean. It started out great, but soon the large swells made me nauseous like I hadn’t been in a long, long time. I cursed the fact that we had signed up for a full day. This was my first (and last) experience to be out of sight of land. The swells were huge; the ocean is a big, big place. She didn’t like me riding her, and I certainly did not like her constant motion and her unstable moods.

Perhaps there is a lesson in this two disparate experiences, but it escapes me at the moment.

Juxtaposition

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Went to a wedding this weekend, held at a museum.  Very classy, I got to spend some time browsing the exhibits.  When I look at the items behind the glass, I find myself wondering where they have been; whose hands have they been through since their creator brought them into being.  It’s like my own little time trip, these items are so old; they’ve lasted so much longer then the hands that shaped/carved/pounded/chiseled.

Needless to say, it’s surreal to be surrounded by these artifacts, drifting through time… with the sounds of inebriated guests dancing the funky chicken setting the ambiance.

Unloading

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You would think by now that most of the differences between women and men would be well discussed. But I’ve discovered something that doesn’t seem to be discussed anywhere!

You know what that is? Well, I’m not going to tell you, otherwise it would move from the realm of undiscussed to discussed and I can’t be responsible for that!

No, I won’t do it.

OK, I will. Here it is: women hate unloading the dishwasher! That’s right! You heard it here first! It’s not just your wife, it’s all women. They don’t mind loading the thing (keep in mind it is all relative, ok?), but they hate the dreaded unload.

Men, if you can get them to deal with doing dishes, don’t mind unloading, but aren’t so fond of loading. For myself, I find (if I have my druthers) that I’d rather put those dry plates in the cupboard then rinse off the sticky ones and line ‘em up in rows.

So I did an experiment. I unloaded the dishwasher, but left the dirty ones on the counter, waiting. Sure enough, the next time I looked the dishwasher was showing me its little green “I’m clean!” light and the counter was cleared and waiting for the next onslaught.

I’ve talked to my friend B and was surprised to discover this little gender nugget. It was confirmed by my own experiment, and over at PW’s website where she had this to say:

Here are my least favorite home-related chores:

* Hauling Groceries from my Car. Also: Putting them away.
* Cleaning/Scrubbing Toilets: I’m sorry, okay? I have overactive gag reflexes.
* Emptying the Dishwasher. Filling it? No problem. Emptying it? BO-RING.
* Putting Away Laundry: I love to fold. I despise putting it away.
* Weedeating. I love to mow. I hate to weedeat. So I’m not going to do it any more.

A quick search on Google for “unloading loading dishwasher” shows that I’m right!

First Day of School Follow-up

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Well, apparently we aren’t the only ones worried about our daughter walking home!

Neighbor 1 stopped his car in the street near where Alex was walking and asked her if she wanted a ride home. Said he picks his daughters up every day, and wouldn’t mind!

Neighbor 2 stopped my wife this morning, and said she saw Alex yesterday, and she wouldn’t mind picking up Alex with her kids. (She also added she wouldn’t even let her boys walk home alone, like we need more to think about.)

Friend 1 saw Alex walking home, and reported in to my wife. How fast she was walking, what she looked like, what she was thinking.

I’m not sure if I should be grateful to have so many people looking out for my daughter, or annoyed!

Let’s go with gratitude.

First Day of School

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Well school has come later this year.  I thought the feds insisted we (“we” being the State of Texas”) open our schools at the same time as the rest of the country – namely after Labor Day.

Regardless, today is the first day of school.  An acquaintance called last night, they were under the impression school didn’t start until Wednesday.  I’m glad they called, boy wouldn’t that have been embarrassing!  Our kids seem, well, indifferent.  Madison doesn’t like new things, but Alex is usually excited about school.  Neither has talked about it much, they just seem to be rolling with it.

But the reason I bring it up is because, this year, it’s a little nerve-racking.  You see, the oldest has decided after school care is no longer socially acceptable.  She has decided she is old enough to walk home by herself; she no longer needs a bus or adult supervision.  Given what that will save us in after-school care, I immediately agreed with this idea.  Money aside, I’m still nervous about this.  Until recently, she would freak if left alone at all.  Now she wants the solitude?

And to make matters a little more difficult, I could not have a copy of the front door key made.  Lowes and Home Depot use the same machine to make copies, they didn’t have a slot that would fit our key.  Damn Brinks! So now she’s got to let herself in the back door, using her hot-pink princess key.  She’s supposed to call me both when school lets out and when she arrives safely at home.

UPDATE: She called on time both when she left the school, and when she made it home.  My wife had this to say:

I just spoke to her (I couldn’t wait, so I called her first).  She says she thinks she’s almost home.  She sounded giddy to be free to walk home.